The song “Ode to Cerridwen” was created out of sheer vulnerability. Looking back now, this chant holds a special place in my heart. It serves as a constant memory of the mark that this beautiful Goddess has left upon me after encountering Her on that “Black Moon” evening in January 2014. Unlike the “Blue Moon” that is the second full moon within one month, the “Black Moon” is when there is a second dark moon within one month. I had recently lost my mother and following her death was dealing with many unresolved conflicts. Then on top of that, an important project had fallen through, and I had a terrible falling out with a dear friend that stirred up many of the same issues I had with my mother. I was not permitted to confront or resolve those issues either. As a result, I was left feeling emotionally abandoned and manipulated, betrayed, exploited and utterly frustrated. A space that I held so sacred felt completely violated. So between dealing with these personal conflicts, it being mid-winter, and feeling somewhat vulnerable and emotionally raw on this Black Moon night, it was like the perfect storm, or at least the perfect conditions for creating the perfect storm within. All I can say is…that it was dark, very dark…….but my soul was ripe and hungry for light, for answers, for wisdom and for change. It was time to change the pattern, get out of destructive relationships, and regain my inner strength and power which I more often than not gave away too easily.
I called out to the Goddess that evening and began to sing whatever came out uncensored, and that was when the chant “Ode to Cerridwen” was written. After singing it several times I felt a wave of comfort and the genuine feeling that everything was going to be OK. It was as if my perceptions shifted both towards my beliefs about Her as well as the situations I was dealing with. She was in that moment both the destroyer and the liberator.
So then who is Cerridwen? Is She a witchy hag that stands over a bubbling slimy green cauldron, cooking body parts, casting an evil spell upon us. Is it She that stirs those ghostly waters that dwell within us, awakening our slumbering shadow, revealing those unwelcomed demons which arise out of that murky swamp, seeking only to devour us. Maybe, but does that necessarily mean that She is evil and a Goddess to be feared? Since that night, for me Cerridwen has become a most beautiful Goddess, a White Goddess, a Goddess of light, and one that I run to and not away from in times of distress. She is the transformer. She holds the energy of inspiration and the seeds of creative expression. She is the one that removes the veils that shroud our light and our power.
To give a brief account of Her legend within the Welsh literature, Cerridwen seeks to give her ugly son Affagdu wisdom so that he may be respected in the world despite his ugliness. She gains the secret of creating the Awen (in the Welsh traditions symbolizes the personification of inspiration and is often referred to as the flowing creative spirit) and was able to concoct a formula that was to brew in her cauldron for a year a day. Gwion, a young innocent boy was asked to tend to the cauldron for the allotted time but was told he must never taste the brew or he would be destroyed. Unfortunately, the brew bubbled over on the last day when it splashed on his thumb, and like anyone would probably do, he put the thumb to his lips. Gwion had inadvertently tasted the Awen. Cerridwen was completely enraged and began chasing him. Gwion was horrified, and it thus forced him to shape shift into a hare, a salmon, a wren and finally into a grain of wheat. Cerridwen was a masterful shape shifter and changed into a greyhound chasing the hare, then into an otter chasing the salmon, then into a hawk chasing the wren, and finally changed into a great Mother hen who ate the grain of wheat. It was through Gwion entering into the womb of Cerridwen that ultimately led to his rebirth when he became known as Taliesin, the Greatest Bard that ever lived.
What does this story teach us about our own lives? The chase between Gwion and Cerridwen reveals both our potential and necessity to continually transform and shapeshift. Life is about adaptability, change, the willingness to fight, survive and surrender. It is knowing when to take action and when to let go. Yet in the end just as the great Bard Taliesin was born from Cerridwen’s womb, we too are reborn and continually evolve in a never-ending process of transformation. Sometimes we may come out feeling stronger and wiser while our characters become more refined, allowing us to see with greater clarity from an entirely new perspective. Yet at other times we may come out of it confused, bitter, hardened, angry, fearful and beaten, feeling lost and disoriented towards the direction our life is taking. Either way, we have to know that transformation is continuous. It’s not like one day we just wake up and we’re “done”. Sometimes we will be at the bottom of a cycle on our way up, or at the top heading on the way down. We are all on the same circle of life just at different points. So what may be an overall moral or lesson the lies within Cerridwen’s legend. The result of the chase was the birth of Taliesin; the greatest bard (his name means “Shining Brow”). We may not all be aspiring to be the greatest poets or musicians or dancers or artists, but we all aspire to be something, somewhere, to someone. That is a common goal that we all share regardless of where we currently reside on this never ending circle of transformation. I believe it is important to honor each other, wherever we are on our paths, for we all may have been there in the past, are currently there now, or perhaps may be there in the future.
To conclude, here are a few short insights that I received through my communion with Cerridwen. There are many more lessons yet to be uncovered, but Her words are gentle reminders to remain opened to Her blessings and gifts in whatever ways that they may manifest.
I called out to the Goddess that evening and began to sing whatever came out uncensored, and that was when the chant “Ode to Cerridwen” was written. After singing it several times I felt a wave of comfort and the genuine feeling that everything was going to be OK. It was as if my perceptions shifted both towards my beliefs about Her as well as the situations I was dealing with. She was in that moment both the destroyer and the liberator.
So then who is Cerridwen? Is She a witchy hag that stands over a bubbling slimy green cauldron, cooking body parts, casting an evil spell upon us. Is it She that stirs those ghostly waters that dwell within us, awakening our slumbering shadow, revealing those unwelcomed demons which arise out of that murky swamp, seeking only to devour us. Maybe, but does that necessarily mean that She is evil and a Goddess to be feared? Since that night, for me Cerridwen has become a most beautiful Goddess, a White Goddess, a Goddess of light, and one that I run to and not away from in times of distress. She is the transformer. She holds the energy of inspiration and the seeds of creative expression. She is the one that removes the veils that shroud our light and our power.
To give a brief account of Her legend within the Welsh literature, Cerridwen seeks to give her ugly son Affagdu wisdom so that he may be respected in the world despite his ugliness. She gains the secret of creating the Awen (in the Welsh traditions symbolizes the personification of inspiration and is often referred to as the flowing creative spirit) and was able to concoct a formula that was to brew in her cauldron for a year a day. Gwion, a young innocent boy was asked to tend to the cauldron for the allotted time but was told he must never taste the brew or he would be destroyed. Unfortunately, the brew bubbled over on the last day when it splashed on his thumb, and like anyone would probably do, he put the thumb to his lips. Gwion had inadvertently tasted the Awen. Cerridwen was completely enraged and began chasing him. Gwion was horrified, and it thus forced him to shape shift into a hare, a salmon, a wren and finally into a grain of wheat. Cerridwen was a masterful shape shifter and changed into a greyhound chasing the hare, then into an otter chasing the salmon, then into a hawk chasing the wren, and finally changed into a great Mother hen who ate the grain of wheat. It was through Gwion entering into the womb of Cerridwen that ultimately led to his rebirth when he became known as Taliesin, the Greatest Bard that ever lived.
What does this story teach us about our own lives? The chase between Gwion and Cerridwen reveals both our potential and necessity to continually transform and shapeshift. Life is about adaptability, change, the willingness to fight, survive and surrender. It is knowing when to take action and when to let go. Yet in the end just as the great Bard Taliesin was born from Cerridwen’s womb, we too are reborn and continually evolve in a never-ending process of transformation. Sometimes we may come out feeling stronger and wiser while our characters become more refined, allowing us to see with greater clarity from an entirely new perspective. Yet at other times we may come out of it confused, bitter, hardened, angry, fearful and beaten, feeling lost and disoriented towards the direction our life is taking. Either way, we have to know that transformation is continuous. It’s not like one day we just wake up and we’re “done”. Sometimes we will be at the bottom of a cycle on our way up, or at the top heading on the way down. We are all on the same circle of life just at different points. So what may be an overall moral or lesson the lies within Cerridwen’s legend. The result of the chase was the birth of Taliesin; the greatest bard (his name means “Shining Brow”). We may not all be aspiring to be the greatest poets or musicians or dancers or artists, but we all aspire to be something, somewhere, to someone. That is a common goal that we all share regardless of where we currently reside on this never ending circle of transformation. I believe it is important to honor each other, wherever we are on our paths, for we all may have been there in the past, are currently there now, or perhaps may be there in the future.
To conclude, here are a few short insights that I received through my communion with Cerridwen. There are many more lessons yet to be uncovered, but Her words are gentle reminders to remain opened to Her blessings and gifts in whatever ways that they may manifest.
“Every day there is at least one beautiful gift bestowed upon you.
First learn to recognize it,
be willing to accept it and lastly
and most importantly,
share it”
************************************
“Go beyond your limitations. Why are you afraid?
Do you think your soul will perish?
It is not quite that easy yet simple is the truth.
Confrontation need not be painful if your boundaries can bear resistance.
All of life surrenders eventually to the whole and returns from whence it came.
Just remember that you are a delicate thread in Nature’s hold,
creating an eternal tapestry that remains yet unseen.”
First learn to recognize it,
be willing to accept it and lastly
and most importantly,
share it”
************************************
“Go beyond your limitations. Why are you afraid?
Do you think your soul will perish?
It is not quite that easy yet simple is the truth.
Confrontation need not be painful if your boundaries can bear resistance.
All of life surrenders eventually to the whole and returns from whence it came.
Just remember that you are a delicate thread in Nature’s hold,
creating an eternal tapestry that remains yet unseen.”